Are there areas of your life that you are truly wanting to succeed in? Maybe for the most part things are going just right in your life, but if there were an area to improve upon, would you be willing to do what it takes in order to see results in this area? Maybe you are stuck and you are looking for change and looking for a way to bring out the best in yourself and others? If you fit one of these areas…this message might be just for you to listen to. Here is a special message from my own corporate trainer and coach, Dani Johnson.
Last post we were discussing the definition of coveting and how it can take root in our lives. To rid ourselves of anything that could possibly be perceived as coveting is to stop looking at what others have and comparing your fruit to theirs. You may have been given the same opportunity to flourish, but you are in a different season or you might just have more to overcome, to learn from so that when it is time, you have the maturity, knowledge, and understanding to know what to do with what you have been entrusted with.
Hi friends! Last time we were talking about success and creating results. The journey to creating results can seem so smooth until a pit fall comes your way. A pit fall is something that must change in you first in order to move forward and create the life you truly desire. Lets take a look and see which one of these pit falls best describes you and how you will overcome it.
The first pit fall is false pride and ego. False pride and ego is over-estimating and compensating your abilities. When you size up your competition to match their credentials, when you obsess to be better than everyone else and strive to achieve results, when the results and success that you have aren’t good enough, when you think you are already better than everyone else and don’t need any more skills and training because you already know it; these are all classic signs of false pride and ego. Just remember one thing, pride always comes before a fall.
Hi, for those of you viewing this post that don’t know much about me, my name is Tara Hayes-Johnson. Prior to going into business for myself, I was working 80-90 hours a week for a boss that didn’t appreciate my work. Not only was I burnt out and stressed out, but I had no money to cover my minimum monthly expenses. Knowing that I was going to law school, not only did I need something that would allow for time, flexibility, and freedom, I needed a way to pay cash for school instead of incurring that student loan debt and adding to the debt I already had. In the last 4 years now, I have been able to profit a 6 figure income averaging 6800.00 in profit per month. My spouse and I have paid off over 84k in debt in 34. All I know is, I am diversifying my income,I never have to answer to another corporate boss again, and we are on our way to financial independence here soon.
You might be reading this thinking so what?!? or yeah right, this is the internet,, how do I know this is real??? I have a message specifically designed for you my friend, so indulge me for a moment and stick this one out, this message probably has a purpose for you.
I share this because recently I faced a bit of an epiphany. You see, even though I have made alot of money the last 4 years, doesn’t mean I mastered how to keep it. There are people that confuse the definition of wealth. For some, ‘wealth’ means making alot of money and for others, it means keeping money in your account. Wealth truly means the ability to make money, keep it in your account, and watch it grow in front of your very own eyes. The difference between who keeps their money and who doesn’t is the difference between the 98% and the 2%. According to my corporate trainer, Dani Johnson, ‘98% of the population will be dead or dead broke by the age of 65,’ Some of us are simply searching and measuring our success, comparing and contrasting success to that of others for many of us in a very unhealthy manner. Do you really want to be another statistic; the sad truth is that 98% of us will settle as another statistic because we simply thought we couldn’t get there ourself.
Think about it, you probably know people who want to ‘keep up with the Jones’. The pressure to have the BEST and have brand NEW things all the time grows on us. We see commercials, we network with people, we listen to the radio; these ‘things’ program our minds and trick it to believe we have to pay more to get more and we have to have the BEST. If we don’t have the best then we are stupid, we don’t fit in, we need to get with the program. How far has the lies, the brainwashing truly gotten you? I know this is going to create a stir for some people, and that’s okay. The truth is as a man thinks so is he. You only think that you need these things because you have been programmed to believe that this is reality and the truth. My friends, the truth is, true millionaires have grown their money by using what they have in front of them. True millionaires are so busy investing into others and putting them first that they don’t care about what they have or what they do not have; they have mastered the ability to keep their money in account that grows them dividends and gives them other options for residual incomes; they have learned how to make wise investments even in a down economy.
Let me ask you, are the 50-,60,70,80 plus hours that you work a week worth it to you? Is it worth it to you to sacrifice your family because the amount is never enough for what is outgoing? When is the last time you did something for yourself that truly made you happy? When did you feel you could cut the break? Is the financial pressure you have worth it to you? When is the last time you took a vacation just because you do? Compare your once or current dream circle and compare it to your income circle? How big is your ego, how far has this gotten you? Are your ideas making you money or leaving you dead broke? What kind of stack is in your account?
If you want to stay that way, then that is on you and I promise not to judge you for the lifestyle you desire. We all have hopes, goals, and dreams, and I would want you to live by your design the way that you are designed to be. If you are happy with where you are at and things are perfect, this might not be the message you were looking to read. If you are reading this, however, with a pit in your stomach there is a reason for that. I am so grateful you are reading this message and if you are upset, I know that is because something has reached down into your heart. Maybe you were like me and didn’t know how to cry out for help or what your next steps were.
Let me share something with you if I may. Let me tell you where I was 4 years ago. This won’t be the whole story, but let me highlight to you what that really looked like, just so you have an idea. If my mess helps your success, I am all about you not making my same mistake. Now seven years ago, I met a guy that I thought appreciated me for me. He spent his time telling me everything I wanted to hear. I would come home to the floor vacuumed, meals made, and a perfectly clean home. He would even get the mail for me and bring it in. Kind of odd for a guy that did construction work, who you would have thought would be so busy working that cleaning was the last on his priority list. When I met him, I had one credit card for emergencies. He was so persuasive that one turned into 5 and 5 then 6, so on and so forth. I was in between work struggling to use credit to pay for basic necessities; my first mistake (never again ever). He was off wining and dining women on my credit, etc. etc. He even took a vehicle to which he had no title to. The situation continued to get worse as I did my own investigating. He promised me the moon, the stars, the sky, but had nothing to show for it. He promised to marry me, took me ring shopping, and almost had me sign off on a town-home that I later found would have been fraud because he had lied on the entire application! I started investigating matters and taking them into my own hands. I was going through a Lifetime drama movie of my own and was terrified to share it openly to anyone. I was raised in a performance oriented household and unless things were good, you didn’t make mention of what was negative. I had rejection, abandonment, fear of mistakes, failure, and success written all over me and I didn’t even understand to the extent it went. He began to avoid me, abandoned his post, and left me high and dry to clean up the mess that he had left from so many women before. As far as I know, I am the only woman that he never put through banktrupcy, but I was super close! Most women he did this to were single mothers raising kids of their own. He had never paid his taxes that I am aware of and stopped his payments to his ex-wife for child support. He rode a slippery slope enough that he barely kept himself out of incarceration. I really didn’t know any better until it was too late, so I thought.
Before I met this character, I had a beautiful apartment and a career going for me. His screaming and threatening antics had me beside myself and impacted my ability to function at work. I had social services and law enforcement background, I should have seen the signs. This is classic right, everyone thinks, ‘well gosh, she should have seen the signs’. You can say that all you want, but love is blind and feelings can lie to you. I learned this all too well the hard way.
I had to pick up two jobs just to pay the bills. In fact, I was working 80-90 hours a week. I got 2 hours of sleep a night, and barely ate because I didn’t have time. I was always on the go and didn’t have the time for a social life. I was burnt out in miserable as a social worker by day and retail worker by night. There were plenty of nights that I didn’t get home until 11:45 at night only to have start on my homework towards my paralegal certification. On top of it, I had made a decision to go to law school and had been going through the application process. I thought I could do everything and I was going to show him what I was capable of.
I moved home briefly, but I never felt like it was home. I was not satisfied with my work and I certainly was not making enough money according to my worth and performance on the job. I was always stressed, especially about my finances. He bought a bunch of stuff that we really didn’t need, but he convinced me we needed it! We had a huge, flat screen tv mounted to our wall with Bose speakers and surround sound! You might not think this is alot, but this was just one out of many items we had no use for when we had a perfectly good, fat box television that was still working!!! Talk about not putting money in the right cases, that was certainly foolish on our parts. The worst part is that we put it on credit! Can you imagine the interest?!?
Because he abandoned his post in my life, both jobs were not cutting the cost of the interest alone. I was able to wheel and deal with the companies on lowering my APRs (annual percentage rates), however, it still wasn’t enough. Gosh, I wasn’t even meeting my minimum monthly expenses, let alone interest payments!!! This man was after my life and I had no idea how I was going to escape all of this mess. I was constantly on the look out, unsure of what he was going to do to me or my bank account next. After I cut him off from access to my finances, it still took me 3 paychecks to reach 33.00 in my checking account! I don’t say this to gain your sympathy, but merely to share what I had gone through. Talk about anxiety and panic attacks on a daily basis. I really truly didn’t see a way out of my situation and became so depressed that I faced suicidal ideations regularly.
I was constantly reminded by others of all the mistakes and failures I had made and what they thought I should do. I couldn’t even think clearly. All I knew to do was to work and work harder to escape the realities of my situation. All I knew was that the income I was bringing was not enough and I had to fix it fast. I began looking for paralegal thinking that might be a good option and then stumbled upon a work at home job. I filled out the information, but didn’t think anything of it. So, I filled the form out not expecting a call. Yet, I received a call. I wasn’t very nice and came up with every attitude and excuse as to why I should not or could not do it. I told the guy who contacted me, ‘I can’t afford to go into business for myself’, ‘what if I don’t have a guarantee’, ‘that’s good for you, but how much have you really made’. No matter what angle you looked at it from, I had an excuse for everything. My director in my business should have just said NEXT and moved on, but somehow, he saw something in me and didn’t give up.
I remember looking at the business opportunity and thinking the investment was hopeless. How could I spend money on something I didn’t have money to waste. Sure the folks in the industry said they would, ‘help me’, but how did I know they really would? I had no experience in business before, so I should just stick with something ‘safe’ and pray that ‘somehow’ I will make it out of my situation if I ‘became’ lucky somehow. One thing was for sure, success wasn’t going to fall out of the sky and I had to do something, but what?
I was fortunate that my parents had put money aside for educational purposes and after I reached a certain age, I had the ability to decide what to do with that money. The stocks were really aggressive, going up and down and I wanted to be sure that I had control over my own finances being in a position to tell them where to go, something I never had control of before. I took a risk without a guarantee (heck, most jobs aren’t stable anymore, look at the number of layoffs in our country today). I finally realized anything is better than my situation. My director, actually two directors, were the first to ever encourage me in a long time. They shared something that really touched me. What they said was profound to me, ‘I believe in you’. When I heard those words, I knew that God had placed these directors in my life for a very important reason. I decided from there on, to be teachable and coachable and follow their directions. I plugged into training designed specifically for our industry and also plugged into our industry’s corporate trainer, Dani Johnson. My first month in business without any prior experience I made 1k, 5200k in 90 days, nearly 50k in under 5 months time, and made over 70k my first year. Here is the kicker, I was still working my full-time day job! I only had 10 hours to work my business in the evenings and on a Saturday! The 70k did not include my pay from my full-time job; it was in addition to. 70k!!! This business became my soul source of income as I worked around law school. I was overly ambitious and not very happy with my decision for law. Something about impacting lives and talking to people around me became more appealing then researching and writing articles. Television makes a career in law look so much more glamorous! I prayed about my decision because I didn’t want to burn both ends of the candlestick.
My business ended up taking off and law school was left in the past. In the meantime, I met my husband while in law school and eventually we ended up married and now have a 22 month old daughter. We are very happy together, but that doesn’t mean after I made that money that again I knew how to keep it!!! For some reason, I had some ‘bright’ idea that I should hurry up and pay off all my debts and fast. In theory, this was an excellent idea, but I paid off too much too quick with my husband. We are glad that to this day we have paid off 84k in 34 months, but had we been applying directions correctly, according to what we learned from our corporate trainer, we could be financially independent right now! We followed some directions, but we didn’t follow all. I guess you could say it was like the recipe that had good intent, but re-inventing the ingredients wasn’t such a great idea when the outcome wasn’t as anticipated. We made alot of money, but we certainly didn’t keep it!
Recently, my husband and I had fallen into a hardship. He works part time, but they give him nearly 40 hours a week pay, or close to, rather. My husband and I agreed he should pick up additional income. With my educational background, I thought I had the cat in the bag and that I should start applying to any agencies that could help us out. Of course we made too much money to qualify and unless we had eviction notices, noone could help. I started applying for work, with my education, I had interviews in no time. I was excited about the interviews, but somehow, not fulfilled. I really had tried to psyche myself into believe that more meant more. If I could just land this one job then I could do it around my business, have a nanny for my child, and give my family everything they wanted.
Sometimes you do get what you want, even if it’s not right for you. This was certainly the case for me. I ended up landing that job that still gave me flexibility around my business and on top of it, I had begun helping another director in my industry. Next thing you know I am back to those 80 hours; back to that bondage that I thought I had said goodbye to forever. I was miserable, making mistakes, and had lost my balance. I was missing appointments, flying on the road, tryng to juggle everything. I was trying to be everything to everyone else. Nothing came out of this, but exhaustion, depression, and meltdown. My work became the very thing that I was eating, breathing, and sleeping. My husband and daughter were on the back-burner, while I was the one that was going to lead us to success, NOT! Sure, my appointments were there and I had prospects I was interviewing, deals were on the horizon, and I was confident I could still do all of this! The more I sat in training, the more I started to have this pit in my stomach that something wasn’t right. I prayed about my situation and once again was removed from it and placed strategically back in my business.
I then realized the epiphany. How could I put my work before my family? Were my priorities really in the right order? Was it worth it to put paychecks that paid our bills before my own family? I have the ability to make 1-9705k a sale in my business, so why would I settle for mediocrity and set myself up to fail? My friends, I am here to tell you no work hours could make up for what I was missing in my family’s life. My husband never had the time to look for additional work and I treated him like he was second class. I never wanted to be with him because I was too busy for him. I am not proud of it, but I was short-tempered with my daughter and here I am supposed to be setting an example by leading in business, but also being a wife and a mom; a role that was seemingly non-existent. Talk about not honoring or respecting the relationships that existed. How in the world could I be made ruler over much when I wasn’t being entrusted with what I was given? The answer and conclusion was a simple one, to help others get what they wanted and I would be entrusted with more. The change started with me. I was at a breaking point and no matter how much my husband encouraged me and supported me, I had to make the decision to change. I decided not to move forward with the job and to scale my hours working with another director and in my own business, cutting it down to no more than 20 hours a week! That is a 60 hour difference, but a well worth it difference! I had something in front of me that had made me so much money in the past, so why did I stray from it? All I had to do was pick up the phone, get in front of the computer, have a hallway commute, and work around my husband and my daughter, putting them first. This meant, in the mornings spending time with them and making them feel special and honored. This also meant that each week my husband and I have begun discussing our schedules for the week so that they coordinate; this has opened up family time to spend doing activities in and out of the home, has allowed one on one instruction time that I can teach my daughter, has allowed us to communicate where we can eliminate expenses in our budget and accrue money, allowed us to pay off more debt, and has allowed our financial income to increase; especially in business. I have now closed 3 sales in the last 1.5 months and finally have time, flexibility, and freedom. Instead of only giving part of myself to my work and my family, I am able to give it my BEST shot in ALL areas and it is such an honor to grow with my family and to be one as a family unit. I am able to have that quality time with my daughter and even date nights with my husband! It is amazing to me how less can truly mean channeling more success.
Again, everything may be perfect in your life and you wouldn’t change a thing. If you are, however, in a rut and tired of not getting anywhere, if you are looking to increase your relationships, better manage your time, while having more fun and making a greater income, visit wwww.danijohnson.com, go under the ‘events’ section and register for the next First Steps To Success.